Paradenitis

One of the key things that we teach salespeople is that your job in sales is to understand what it is that people do, and then to help them do it better. For only by understanding what people do; how they do it, why they do it that way, when they do it, and who they do it with, can you be in a position to really help them and show them what will make sense to them. Notice that the emphasis here is on the prospect: what makes sense to THEM. It’s not about what makes sense to you, or what you would like to sell them. Notice also that we’re not talking about asking prospects about their “needs,” “problems,” or “pain.”

As D.E.I. Management Group President and author, Steve Schiffman says in his book “The 250 Sales Questions to Close the Deal:”

What if I ask the person to describe pressing business problems that he or she will face in the future? What if I build my proposal around those business issues? I might get a decent picture of what is going on in that person’s world, but I will not get the whole picture. Even if you discover everything about the person’s pains, needs, and problems, you will have only learned about certain parts of their situation – the parts that are currently causing pain and problems. You won’t be getting the whole picture. What about the rest of your contact’s situation – the things that don’t fit in the categories of pain, needs, or problems? What’s going on there? If I only ask about “needs,” I don’t know – and if you’ve only been asking the types of questions mentioned above, neither do you.

Let’s explore this a bit more deeply. People will only make a decision to do something if it makes sense to them. I think that’s something we can all agree on. So how do we know what will make sense to someone we meet for the first time, or whom we don’t know all that well? That comes through asking questions and in taking a genuine interest in the people we meet with.

Many of us in sales were taught, at one time or another, that we need to be good listeners, and that we need to show we care by asking questions. Yet how many of us really do a good job at that? We are excited about our products and services – we want to jump right in and show our prospect that we have the fix for whatever ails them. We need to learn to fight that urge to “throw-up” on the prospect with our solution to their problem – for if we do this too soon in the process we’re really just guessing at what makes the most sense to them.

An understanding of basic human motivation will help you ask better questions to arrive at the ultimate plan that will make sense to your prospect. As human beings, we are all drive by two primary motivating factors; the desire to avoid pain, or the desire to gain something. Or, to put it another way – we either want to fix something that isn’t working, or we want to create a better future.

Consultant and author Mahan Khalsa in his book “Let’s Get Real or Let’s Not Play” says it well:

People who are trying to “move away from pain” will interpret issues as pain and may give us a list a problems, frustrations, and dissatisfaction. They may even use physical or emotional pain phrases like: “It’s killing us…,” “We’re bleeding…,” “It’s a pain in the neck…,” It’s a real headache…,” It’s a nightmare…,” “It’s like pulling teeth….”

People who are “moving toward gain” will interpret issues as results (i.e., objectives, goals, and outcomes). They may use phrases like” “What we’d like to see…,” “What we think is possible…,” “Our vision is…,” “What we’re excited about is…,” “Our end in mind is…,” “We’d like to create…,” etc. Their language will give us some hints about where they would like to start. We’ll just need to be aware of the language.

Our job in asking questions then, is to listen to what our prospect says and determine which mode they are operating in – listen to their language, and then ask more questions to find out more about their unique situation. In doing this, you will want to ask questions that relate to the past, the present, and the future. Asking about the past will help you determine what problems they may be dealing with that they want to fix. Asking about the present will focus in their present situation and the current “status quo”. Future based questions will give you a sense of what goals and outcomes they hope to accomplish. All of these areas are important to gain a full sense of what will makes sense to the person and of what will lead them to buy.

Every conversation is unique. You need to focus on what your contact is telling you and then follow-up with a logical question to dig deeper. Each question you ask should follow from the question and answer before it. For example, suppose you are speaking with someone and she tells you that her company plans to open 5 new locations in the next year. What will your next question be? Here are some possibilities:

• That’s great. I’m just curious, why five?

• That’s great. I’m just curious, where will they be? How did you decide on those locations?

• That’s great. What are your first year projections for those locations?

• That’s great. What kinds of challenges do you typically face when you open new locations?

You could probably come up with several other questions you could use here, but the point is that the question is squarely focused on them – and may not even have anything directly to do with your offering. Remember, your goal is to understand as much as you can about them. Through question like this you are developing a real conversation. A conversation in which your contact’s comfort and trust level will increase, and one in which you will gain real insight into what they “do” – what they hope to accomplish as well as the problems they need to solve.

Only once you’ve gained a better sense of their past, present, and future – along with problems (pain) and goals (gain) are you in a position to make a real recommendation or proposal.

Moving quickly through this step can jeopardize your opportunities to build a real relationship and to add real value to the selling situation. Take the time to truly understand what your prospect does, and you will see your sales increase!

Copyright 2005 Lexien Management Consultants, Inc

Mark Dembo; President, Lexien Management Consultants ( http://www.lexien.com ).
Lexien Management Consultants is a consulting and training company providing growth-oriented companies with strategies, tools, and skills to improve their top and bottom-lines. Each month, Lexien publishes the Sales Success Newsletter. You can contact Mark at 914-682-2069, or at mdembo@lexien.com.

Duet acting scripts are difficult to find on the Internet. If you’ve done any poking around at all in search of one, you already know this. But there is an alternative. More important, it’s an alternative that will not only help hone your acting skills, but also aid you in understanding your characters even better.

The solution?

Write your own duet acting scripts.

I know. I know. Writing’s scary. But this doesn’t need to be a painful process or even a particularly difficult one. In fact, it can and should contribute to your inventory of acting skills by forcing you to become more in touch with and more observant of the world of characters already all around you. Especially those who might otherwise go unnoticed.

And that’s the key to writing your own duet acting scripts: observation. The better you are at observing, the easier the writing is going to be.

Ready to get started?

The easiest, most direct path to writing your own scripts is to start a swipe file. If you aren’t familiar with a swipe file, this is a term that’s often used in marketing and copywriting circles. A good copywriter will save ads, brochures, and mailers that he comes across so he can learn from them and refer back to them when he’s developing his own ad campaigns. Now, he doesn’t just copy this material and present it as his own. He simply draws upon it for inspiration and guidance.

This is what you should be doing, too. You won’t be looking at ads, of course, but you will be carefully observing the interactions of the people around you and recording your observations.

For example, you’re in the checkout lane at the store, picking up a few groceries, and the checker is chatting with the bagger. They’re talking about the date the checker went on the night before and how it was a dud. That’s a duet script.

For example, you take your dog into the veterinary office for his annual series of shots and there are two other dog owners in the waiting room. One has a dog with a broken leg that’s healing. The other has a puppy that’s tugging on the chain, full of energy, wanting to play with the healing dog. Gradually, you see the tension growing between the two dog owners until it suddenly spills over into a conversation about responsible dog ownership. That’s a duet script.

For example, you’re at the local bookstore, reading a mystery and enjoying a cup of coffee, when a woman comes through the door, admonishing her elderly mother about the fact that she doesn’t get out enough. That’s a duet.

These are everyday occurences. They happen all around you. But you know what makes them worth your attention? They reveal character. Each and every one reveals character. And that’s what a good duet script should do.

It won’t take you long before you’ll have a fairly weighty file of these situations, trust me. Most of the writing is already done for you. The words that are exchanged in these situations are honest words. They cut into the heart of each person. And they’re all right there for the taking.

Now, there’s a very simple technique you can use to take a single situation and turn it into multiple duet acting scripts. You change the characters. Instead of the mother and daughter coming through the door, it’s a mother and son. Instead of the daughter concerned about her mother not getting out, have the mother concerned about her daughter. Try a bitter daughter. Try a meek daughter. Try a guilty daughter. Try a blind daughter. The potential for unique characters is endless. You already have the foundation in hand. All you need is to explore the possibilities.

Writing a duet acting script doesn’t have to be overwhelming. Using the techniques we’ve touched upon here, you’ll not only build a great library of scripts, you’ll expand your understanding, empathy and awareness of character.

It’s worth the extra effort. Try it. You’ll see.